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Roads Are For Driving



You're cruising down Main St. in your boosted F350. You just poked a hole in the muffler. You've got "Heart Like a Truck" blasting on the radio. The sun is shining. People are turning their heads to stare at you in admiration.

And all of a sudden you realize the only thing that could make this day any better is a Frosty from DQ Grill & Chill.

So you go to take your first left and... the road is covered in multicolored nonsense and blocked by picnic tables.

You do the responsible thing and not turn them into kindling (no one thanks you), but by the time you've driven two streets down and been "allowed" to take a left on Museum St., the line at DQ is too long and you don't even want ice cream any more.

And all of this heartbreak and inconvenience so we can have one car-free street and give preferential treatment to three businesses that don't exist?

If you're like us, this has been the reality of the last two years. But finally, thanks to some no-nonsense city councilors, the street has been liberated.

The last thing we want to come across as here at Whispers is anti-art, but murals are meant to depict scenes of natural beauty and famous battles.

If you ask us, it's all been part of the liberal elite agenda (probably in cahoots with Big Bike and Big Foot) to make Rockland Main St. only for pedestrians.

If our ancestors wanted us to walk they would have built paths.




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