The weather finally got above 60 degrees. It's May. And you know what that means.
If you haven't been swimming yet, you're a loser bitch.
You may have missed it if you don't have ears, but everyone was polar plunging all winter. They went in the ocean. They cut holes in the ice. They took saunas and went back and forth. They made a weekly thing of it. It was all about controlling their breath. That's what the Weimar Method says.
It was so relaxing. But also invigorating. But also healing.
But you missed your chance. Because you're a soft, scared loser.
And now you have to spend all summer listening to them keep talking about how the Winklevoss Method changed their life.
And you can't say shit.
You think you're going to chime in and say "I went in May"?
Oh yeah, was it cold?
Not as cold as January, loser. And you probably only stayed in for what, 30 seconds? They stayed in for 15 minutes. It's all about controlling your breathing. Did we mention that?
Have a fun summer, loser.